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Thursday, January 22, 2009

way out in the outback!

A drover named Jack' was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous outback pasture, when suddenly a brand new BMW appears out of a cloud of dust and heads towards him.
The driver, a man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks Jack, "If I can tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me one?"

Jack looks at the man, obviously a city guy, then looks at his peaceful grazing herd, and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"
The man parks his car, whips out his "DEL notebook computer" connects it to his Cingular RAZR VR mobile phone, and surf to a NASA page on the internet, where he calls up a GPS Sattelite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA sattelite which scans the area in an ultra-high resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in "Adobe photo shop" and exports it to an imaging processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his palm-pilot that the image has been processed and the data has been stored.
He then accesses an MS-SQL data base through an ODBC connected Excel spread sheet with email on his blackberry, and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-colour 150 page report on his Hi-tech miniaturized HP laser Jet printer and finally turns to the drover and says, "You have a herd of exactly 1.586 animals!"

"That's right, so I guess you can take one, " Says the drover.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused, as the young man tries to stuff it in the boot of his car.
Jack then says to him, " Hey, if I can tell you what business you're in, will you give me back my animal?"
The young man thinks about it for a minute and says,"Okay, why not?"
"You work for the Government....!"says Jack.

"WOW, that's right," says the young man, "But how did you guess that?"
"No guessing needed, "says Jack, "You showed up here even though no one called for you, you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked, you tried to show me how much smarter than me you are, and you don't know a thing about cows. This is a herd of sheep, and now....

give me back my dog!"

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