Are there people in your life, who, as soon as they are in your vicinity they become a different person, it seems, just to upset you?
And then, do you feel that, because you are a Christian, you have to put up with it?
They might even challenge you and demand that, "Well you say you are a Christian, you should be able to handle it..."
because of our Christian teaching on humility, self sacrifice and kindness?
We then give ourselves the impression that, "to set boundaries of any kind for these kind of people is wrong, and that we must take, whatever they dish out!"
Well, I do not believe that. When we allow abusive people to continually abuse us,
verbally or mentally or physically,we give them, as it were, permission to sin.
The best thing we can do for them is to leave them! When we do this,
we then stop this person from sinning!
Obviously when it happens in our home, by say, a rebellious teenager, it makes it much more difficult.
But to let him/her get away with it is much worse....
(If you had a puppy, and it was constantly barking, you'd do something about it wouldn't you? You would teach it, that by ignoring it when it barked, and making a fuss when it didn't, he would quickly learn not to bark, if it wanted attention, you would maybe even give it a treat for not barking....)
it would work something like that with a rebelious teenager too...
Ask yourself the question..."Why is this teenager so rebelious?"
Love must be tough enough too, to do hard things for the best interest of your child.
No one, teenager or adult, has the right to turn the family home into a war zone.
And, if there is no change in behaviour, we have to be tough and send them on their way! If not, these teenagers will bring the same kind of attitude into their relationships.
I am not saying here to, "look after #1" What I am saying is that when we are told that our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit, we are obliged to look after it, and make sure it is not destroyed by others who seem to be only too happy to do so!
When someone deliberately goes out of their way, so it seems, to cause distress for others, they are being used as a tool for the devil, and we are allowed to do whatever it takes, to protect ourselves to stop the enemy from getting to our heart and mind. God did provide an armour for us and we are obliged to use it every day, for protection, even if that sometimes means saying "No" to a relationship that can be harmfull.
That goes for any relationship....be it....a son...a daughter.....an inlaw.....friend.....
And, whether we like it or not, it can also mean looking for alternative living arrangements for a rebellious young teenager. Love is tough!
It also sometimes means telling some one you can't be there for them...no matter how difficult that might be!
The good news is that God can change these people,but, it does not, despite our most sincere prayers, always happen.
But,,,we do not have to put up with it!