Some Commission or other, in Europe... has made the announcement that English will be the official language
of the E.U. instead of the German language.
The British government did agree, how ever that there was room for improvement to the English language.
So they have accepted a 5 year "phase in plan" that would become known as "Euro-English"
In the first year the "S" will be replaced with a soft "C" and sertainly this will make sivil servants jump for joy!
The hard "C" will be dropped in favour of "K" this should klear up konfusion and key boards kan have one lesser letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "PH" will be replaced with
"F" as this will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the third year... publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more
komplikated changes are possible.
Government will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always been a deterent to akurate
Also, .al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "E" in the language is disgrasful, and should be removed.
By the fourth yer, people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "TH" with "Z" and "W" with "V"
During ze fifz yer, ze unesasary "O" can be dropd from vords containing "OU" and after ziz fifz yer
ve vil hav a rel sensble riten styl.
Zer wil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech oza.
Ze drem of a United urop vil finali kum tru!
Und, efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in forst plas!
He was just a little boy, wandering home from Sunday school....taking his time.
He scuffed his shoes into the grass. He even found a caterpillar....and a fluffy milk weed pod.....
and blew the whole lot away into the wind.....
An old neighbour was watching him.....zig zagging along the path and called out to him.
He asked the young man where he'd been and what he'd learned.
"I've been to Bible school" said the young boy, and picked up a wriggle worm, then said, "I learned a lot about God..." "Hummmm, a very fine way for a young boy like you to spend your day" said the neighbour, "But I'll tell you what, If you tell me where God is, I'll give you a brand new dime..."
Quick as a flash the boy replied..."I'll give you a dollar mister....if you tell me where God Aint"