She tells it this way:
“ When I was 7 years of age my dad had me carry boxes out to the burn barrel, behind the apartment building where we lived.
He started the fire, and I started to walk away, when he said, “You come back here, and help me......throw these books in the fire!”
I grabbed one to throw in, and noticed it was a Bible. I watched my dad throw some in and I thought I saw the Bibles bleeding. In my mind, I saw Jesus crying, and felt like He was.
I wasn't going to throw the Bible into the fire, instead I said to him, “Why can't we just put these on peoples porches by their door?” I kept giving him ideas, but he shot them all down and kept throwing the Bibles in and tried to convince me that it was red dye from the Bibles I was seeing, and not blood!
I just left and went back inside, feeling bad for Jesus.
My dad always hit me with his belt whenever I disobeyed him, and always grounded me, but nothing like that happened that day.
I believe Jesus saved me from punishment from my dad.
I'm not sure if there is a connection, but many years later, dad left and abandoned my mum.
He started to have problems 7 years later, and then was diagnosed with leukemia. A blood disease, of which he finally died in 2008.
The point I was making was that, I knew when I was 7 years old, Jesus watches all the time, and I think I reminded my dad of that, but I knew that he 'knew' all the time, because he justified all the things he did that were wrong.
I think that's how it is with most of us, when we don't want to give up a sin and we know that Jesus is watching.
We justify it, as if Jesus is okay With what we are doing.
There's only one thing left in my life that I do that with......that I'm still working on......
It's when I'm watching certain types of movies....you know....what goes into your mind.....defiles the heart.....There are lots of movies we should not be watching, but we do!
I have to stop doing this, but Right now, I am still confined to my home 24/7, but as soon as I get my surgery, then wait 3 months after that,
then I can go out and do projects, maybe even get a job.
I am so sick of not being able to get out and do anything....All there is at the moment is T.V. Or the computer.
I'm sure everything will happen in God's time, hopefully it's soon!
Praying that it's soon because I am depressed and frustrated...”
(Not long after this she was called to her eternal home where she is happy and healthy, she never did get that operation she was so waiting for...didn't need it where she is now.)
Miss you, beautiful Suzanne.