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Friday, September 11, 2009

some funnies

Some things people actually say in court:

Q: "What is your date of birth?"
A: " 15th July.." Q: What year? A: "Every year..."

Q: "The youngest son, the 20 year old, how old is he?"
A:" He's 20..."

Q: "Were you present, when your picture was taken?"
A: "duh...." ( no answer!)

Q: She had three boys....right?" A: "yes" Q: How many of these were girls?" A: "none"

Q: How did your marriage end?" A: "By death" Q: "By whose death was it ended?"

Q: " Do you remember the time of the autopsy?"
A: " Around 8.30am" Q: "And, Mr Denning was dead at this time?"
A: "No...no.....he was sitting on my desk, wondering what I was doing..."
Q: "Before you did the autopsy...did you check for a pulse?" A: "No..."
Q: " Did you check for blood pressure?" A: "No"
Q: " Did you check for breathing?" A: "No"
Q: "So, then, it is possible that the patient was alive....before you began?"
A: "No..." Q: "How can you be so sure DOCTOR?"
A "Because his brain was sitting in a jar on my desk...!"
Q: But...he could have been alive?"
A" Yes......he could have been practicing some profession somewhere...."

An elderly couple were having dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the women went into the kitchen.
The two husbands were talking, and one said, "Last night, we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great, I would recommend it highly!"
The other man said, "What was the name of this place?"

The first man thought for a while then said, " What is the name of that flower you give someone you love, the one that's red and has thorns?"
The reply was, "Do you mean a rose?"
"Yes," he said, "That's the one....." then he turned to the kitchen and yelled...."Hey Rose....what was the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"

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